Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

I regularly think about how cool your nickname is

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."

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(703): View more from Virginia

well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too

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(408): View more from California

He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this

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(204): View more from Manitoba

For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.

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(905): View more from Ontario

I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.

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(628): View more from California

That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.

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(559): View more from California

He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess

(852): View more from

keeper.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.

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