so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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