you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Randomize