id be glad to
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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