Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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