Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
