CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
