i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize