Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
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