Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Randomize
