that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
