If i come over, it means nothing
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Randomize
