he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
