Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
