good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm always down for nudity.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
