I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
