HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
