btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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