Whod you bang
Just fell off a train. Bad.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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