I don't think brook has ever known best
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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