I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
honey bunches of taint.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
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