Do vagina's smell?
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize