come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
