I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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