so explain again why im purple
no
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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