Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
