How'd it feel making her break her religion?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
