Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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