You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
