what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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