maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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