Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
