omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
