Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
