is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
