You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
