just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
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