so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
