super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
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