My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
