marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
you made out with another girl for some wings
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
