i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
