There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
