You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Randomize