so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
