Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
if i can run in heels then i can drive
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
