Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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