I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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