Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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