im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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