from now on my penis is your penis
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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